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Coffee shops may feel cozy and casual, but one etiquette expert says too many customers forget they are still shared public spaces.
“Coffee shops may feel like our living rooms, but they’re really shared living rooms — and shared spaces work best when everyone remembers their manners,” California-based etiquette expert Lisa Mirza Grotts told Fox News Digital.
In a recent blog post, Grotts said even well-meaning customers often break unwritten rules without realizing it. “Public spaces require extra awareness,” she said.
Here are five common habits she says customers should stop.
1. Going to the counter unprepared
Customers should decide on their drink — including size and any sweetness adjustments — before stepping up to the counter, Grotts said. “Awareness saves everyone from unnecessary tension.”
She advises following what she calls the “three P’s”: “be prepared, present, and polite.” “Know what you want before you reach the counter, put your phone away — unless you’re using it to pay — make eye contact, and say ‘please’ and ‘thank you,'” she added.
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2. Being on your phone while ordering
“Coffee shops operate on flow,” Grotts said in her post. “When one customer hesitates at the counter, it disrupts the rhythm for everyone behind them. A moment of awareness keeps the line — and the mood — moving.”
Good manners are really about awareness, Grotts said. “Recognizing that baristas are working hard, and that other customers are waiting their turn. You’re one in a line of many.”
Grotts said these small courtesies help keep the line moving and make the experience better for everyone.
3. Treating the café like your personal office
The coffee shop is not your living room or personal office, Grotts said.
“Shared spaces come with shared responsibility,” she said. “Clean up after yourself, keep conversations at a reasonable volume, and treat staff respectfully. These small behaviors show that you recognize you’re part of a community; not the only person in the room.”
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4. Over-complicated orders
Coffee culture has made highly customized drinks the norm, but Grotts said timing should guide how elaborate a request becomes and that courtesy matters most when others are waiting.
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“Etiquette is really about reading the room and recognizing that your choices affect other people’s time,” she added. “If the line is long, keeping your order simple is thoughtful, especially if you’re ordering something you get regularly.”
5. Camping out without buying
“It’s rude when a café becomes a rent-free workspace,” Grotts said. “The unspoken agreement is simple: you purchase, they welcome you. You linger, you replenish. Repeat as needed.”
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A good rule of thumb is to order something when you first sit down and to make another purchase about every hour you stay there, she said. During busy times, customers should also be prepared to give up their seats.
“In the end, good manners aren’t about rules — they’re about respect,” Grotts said.
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