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Things Stupid People Do: Argument Over Chores Leads to Gun Play

Who’s responsible for doing these dishes? In yet my second reference within a month to the hit television show, It’s Always Sunny In Philidelphia, a Lackawanna County, Pennsylvania, man is facing charges after authorities say he fired a gun at another man during an argument over, of all things, the dishes!

According to the Carbondale Police Department, officers were dispatched to Laural and Rock Street on October 9th responding to reports of a fight and a gunshot at around 7:30 pm. When police caught up with the alleged suspect who had fled the scene, Frank Kleinbauer, 47, of Carbondale, Pennsylvania, tried to pin the shenanigans on his wife. What a guy!

Police say Kleinbauer claimed his wife had shot a firearm loaded with blanks at a man outside their home on Rock Street. Officers were skeptical, however, as the story makes zero sense on multiple levels. Who keeps a gun loaded with blanks? Who fires said blanks at a random pedestrian? Who in the hell behaves like this and tries to incriminate his wife, unless of course there are preexisting marital issues? And if there weren’t, there are now.

Eventually, officers arrived at the residence where they took a statement from the victim. According to the affidavit, the fight began after Kleinbauer’s mother yelled at the victim for refusing to do the dishes. Investigators say that the yelling was followed by Kleinbauer himself punching the victim in the face before heading upstairs to retrieve a firearm. Upon return,  Kleinbauer pointed his gun at the victim and fired. 

That’s when the victim then fled, running outside to his sister’s home where Kleinbauer allegedly followed him at first before going back into his own home and then returning once again to apologize for shooting at the victim. He shot at him, but hey, at least he apologized.

For anyone who may have thought the gun loaded with blanks could actually be plausible, it wasn’t. Further investigation revealed to detectives that the firearm used in the incident was in fact loaded with real ammunition. Also to the surprise of nobody whatsoever, court records conclude that it was Kleinbauer, and not his wife, who fired the shot. 

Frank Kleinbauer has been charged with aggravated assault, simple assault and recklessly endangering another person. 

Luckily, no injuries were reported related to the incident other than some soreness from shaking my head. Thankfully neck tattoo wasn’t much of a shot, so everyone lives to fight another day. This story leaves me with more questions than answers, like how did his wife feel about getting the finger falsely pointed at her by her own husband? What I really want to know is, who ended up doing the damn dishes?

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